Just Mean!

Girls are Mean!

And honestly, so are guys.

What I’ve learned in 20+ years of working with youth, and has been brought to my attention (several times) recently is that girls are just downright mean to each other sometimes….okay, most of the time. And by most of the time, I mean almost all of the time there are girls in a given school, who are being mean to at least one other girl.

I don’t claim to be, nor will I ever, an expert on middle school girls - but we’ve all been around at least one story or group of girls talking about how ‘so-and-so was mean’ or ‘she did this to the other girl.’ You get the picture. I was in a group of youth recently where a conversation began about the differences between guys and girls - especially at school.

What the room quickly realized, keeping in mind more guys were present than girls, was that there were some stark differences in how each approaches various situations. In this case it was guys vs. girls that shed light on these differences - but I would push back that it’s simply the choices of one person versus another.

There is a lesson for all of us in this

(girls, guys, parents, teachers and global citizens). Every day we have a choice - let’s call it living in our circle of control. Anything in that circle is yours to control - hint YOU are the only thing in that circle! Beyond that is influence and influence only. Each day we’re likely to encounter someone who is being ‘mean’. Sometimes it might be the person in the mirror.

My friend and mentor John Maxwell says “Leadership is influence, nothing more, nothing less.”

So, today my message is this:

Let’s choose to control what we can and then use our gifts, our skills, our LEADERSHIP to positively influence those around us - including the person in the mirror. Maybe you’re not the “mean girl” but how you respond can help the mean girl choose to use her influence in a different way.

I’m excited to journey with many young women and men - from grades 3-12 (and beyond) AND Parents too - this year so we can all be leaders of positive influence and change in our world around us. If you’re interested in learning more about all things YOUTH I’d love to chat with you. www.leadershipharbor.com/youth Together we can change the world and we can do it all while being nice!

Go Make It A Great Day,


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